Approaching our 5th month!

With work no longer at the back of my head (thanks to the hospitalisation leave, but no thanks to depression and anxiety from work stress), I find myself slightly better able to manage my emotions. I'm happy not entirely because i'm less burdened by my panic attacks, but because i know it's easier on you when i'm healthy! I still have much room for improvement, but i am confident i will only get better from now :-)

i am amazed at how much i've grown to trust you over these 4.5 months too. I've always struggled to trust anyone, even myself, for fear of disappointments because i learnt such a painful and hard lesson from my 1st ex. I think we both worked hard at it, but perhaps you did a little harder standing by my side all this time that i needed you the most. I cant quite put down 1 or 2 things that you did that made me grow to trust you, but here are a list of things that moved me into trusting you:

1. you fulfilled your promises of being there for me whenever i need you, even when you were tired out from work and we live 30mins apart
2. you would always let me decide where to eat without complains
3. you would never get mad at me for being indecisive, worrisome, and stubborn
4. you make serious commitments for our long-term future
5. you've never glanced at any pretty girls whenever we're out (altho girls steal glances at you sometimes)
6. you call me beautiful even when i'm at my ugliest
7. you enjoy laughing at the ugly photos you take of me and claim that they're your favorites (-.-")
8. you would always comfort and encourage me when i'm into panic mode

i could go on, but it would get boring...in any case, i will never worry about you leaving me for another girl because i know that's not possible. we love each other so much that it's impossible to imagine us being apart from one another. I have so much fun with you everytime we hang out, and it's wonderful that i feel i'm in love with you EVERY TIME we're together. i think it's definitely an achievement! i know of many other couples who settle into their comfort zones after the first 3 months and began to feel that hanging out is routine rather than an act of love.

i know we will have many challenges ahead of us in this journey, but with you i'm fearless and ready. I know that you will be my pillar of support if i need it, and that we will work out our future problems together. You seem to feel inadequate sometimes that you're not able to provide a ready-made comfortable/luxurious life for our future, but i assure you that i already feel pampered with your concern and love, and that I will never quarrel with you over financial provisions. God has already given me the most precious gift, and i will not ask for anything more.

So here's how we spent our Sunday 10 March 2013:

I can still imagine you poking that extra flab of flesh behind my shoulders now... T.T